Applying mindset principles to my own situation.

My @growthmindset1 has been a little quiet recently. The reason for this is because I have not been very well. I want to share my situation in case there is someone out there that is going through anything similar. I know that I have found strength and motivation from other people’s stories.

In 2009 I was diagnosed with an overactive thyroid. I had all the classic symptoms – weigh loss, memory fog, intolerance to heat, shakes and anxiety. I was also suffering from atrial fibrillation which was attributed to the over active thyroid. Medication controlled the thyroid function but doctors were keen to look for a longer term solution as I was 34 years old.

In 2010 I under went radioactive iodine treatment to resolve my thyroid issue. Over the next few months, following this treatment, my thyroid became under active, which seems to be a typical outcome. I started to take thyroxine to regulate my thyroid function.

My thyroid function has proved difficult to control. I have learnt that having a thyroid function within the normal range does not always mean that you feel great. Most doctors do not accept this, the most common view is that if it is in the normal range then you are ok. I have found a couple of doctors who have adopted a much more patient friendly approach and they ask the question,”How do you feel?”. This approach has meant that we have now identified that I feel much better which a TSH level closer to 1.2. If it is over 2.0 then I do not feel good. It is great to let the patient feelings override the biochemistry results. After all what is normal?

It is worth mention that, for me, having a TSH reading above 2.0 meant that I had many of the underactive thyroid symptoms – weigh gain, tiredness, muscle cramps, depression, mental fatigue and sensitivity to cold. It was difficult for some doctors to recognise these symptoms as being unwanted. If seems that if you look well, all is ok.

In 2012 I had an episode of atrial fibrillation. This had to be treated by electrocardioversion to put my heart back into sinuous rhythm. Interestingly my TSH was 3.72. This had doctors scratching their heads as this indicates that it is under active which would not normally trigger atrial fibrillation.

In 2014 I had my first catheter ablation. During this process the area in your heart responsible for the misfiring that leads to atrial fibrillation is identified. The surrounding cells are then damaged using radio frequencies that generate heat. The latest research shows that the cells surrounding the pulmonary veins are often responsible for the misfiring that leads to atrial fibrillation. These were targeted in my heart and all four pulmonary vein openings were burnt. This leads to scarring in the area which should prevent the misfiring signal.

The success rate of this process is not high and unfortunately in my situation this did not resolve the problem of atrial fibrillation. I went on to have more episodes of atrial fibrillation.

In 2016 I decided to look at my lifestyle with the aim of making it healthier. I watch what I eat and I have been doing HiiT sessions (thanks Joe Wicks his YouTube sessions), cycling and walking as much as possible. I was feeling good. My fitness improved, I lost 20kg and I had more energy. To fit the exercise into my daily routine I get up at 5.30am, workout and then I am finished by the time that the family wakes up. This is a great way to start your day. It gives you a great energy rush. My mindset has been to have the discipline to get out of bed and try to do better today than I did yesterday. After each ablation I have had to start again to build my exercise levels back up. This has been mentally challenging but the desire to get better has really been a strong driving force.

In 2017 I had my fourth ablation. I believe the average is 2-3. Since this ablation I have not had any episodes of atrial fibrillation (touching lots of wood here!). I have, We however, experienced different issues. I have been struggling with my breathing and have had four chest infections in the last four months. I have also developed a premature ventricular ectopic heart beat. These symptoms have been dismissed and have not been linked to each other or my previous medical history. The dots were not joined.

A few weeks ago I had a CT heart scan, this was suggested by the surgeon that had carried out the ablations.

In the last two weeks I have been experiencing pain in the left side of my chest along with the breathing difficulties. This worried me as I had been feeling much fitter. Walking upstairs would now leave me out of breath.

On Thursday I was woken up with severe chest pains. An ambulance came and I was taken to hospital. The CT scan had shown that I have one completely blocked pulmonary vein and one that is seriously narrowed. This have been caused as a result of the scarring from the ablations. This is not due to the fault of anyone, it is a risk attached to the procedure. These blockages are causing fluid to build up around my lungs which is leading to the pain and breathing difficulties that I am experiencing.

I am currently waiting for emergency heart surgery to open the veins again. It is hoped that following this surgery my health should improve and I should be able to resume normal activities.

This has been quite a journey. I realise that I am incredibly fortunate to have had great medical opportunities and support. There are many people who would not have had this type of option. I also understand that there are many people dealing with far more serious and life changing situations. On the grand scale of things this situation is minor. I am sharing this for a couple of reasons:

1.  There have been many times when I have had to question medical advice. This can be intimidating to do and at times you are made to feel like a nuisance but it is through this questioning that my condition has been identified and is on course to be resolved.
2. There were times that giving up and taking an easy option were very attractive options. It is at these times that you have to dig deeper. At these times it is important to have something to work towards. My goal was to get fitter and healthier so I can enjoy my time with my young family.  I have used many of the quotes and motivational videos shared on @growthmindset1 to keep me going. I have a number of these quotes and messages on my fridge so I can read them at low points.

I wish you health and happiness.